There YOU are!

  I think God has been trying to teach me something.  Naw, I know he's been teaching me something.  Humility is a theme that keeps popping up again and again!  It's the character trait I admire most.  A product of humility is putting others first.  I'm not talking "Martyrdom" here.  And I'm sure not saying that when you do put someone else first, that you should go around looking for a medal!  But when you put others first, blessings come right back atcha!
  To be able to put someone else first, you must recognize it's not all about you!  I once read an article about Tim Tebow.  A homeschool kid that played football (for the Florida Gators), so I naturally took an interest in him.  The article stated that his parents never let him read a newspaper article about himself.  He was praise worthy, a Heisman winner.  But they didn't want him to get too full of himself.  I liked that.  Okay, if you make the paper, it is kinda fun!  But I get where they were coming from.  He was getting a lot of attention, and they wanted to keep him grounded.  Words of praise have much more impact when they come out of someone else's mouth, not your own.  That's humility.  It's a struggle.  We naturally want to think about #1!!  Call it self preservation.
  Thinking about someone else doesn't mean you have to go without three squares, or forgo paying the rent.  No.  Fulfill your responsibilities! What is does mean is that you should realize, it's not all about you!  There is always someone who has it worse off.  I was mulling things over with a friend who suffers from depression.  She told me what she has come to learn is that when she helps someone else, she feels better about her own situation.  Have you worked at a soup kitchen?  Have you ever given school supplies out in a low income neighborhood?   Participated in a fundraiser for a sick friend or family member?  How did you feel after?  I know how I feel.  I feel good!  I feel like I've accomplished something!  It can be a small thing like clearing your schedule for the afternoon to sit with a friend in a hospital room.  You may not have any idea of the impact it had on the other person, but I guarantee it did.  The blessing comes when someone says, "Thank you!  (with tears in their eyes) It means so much to me to know how much you care!"  Because really, what else matters?  All any of us want is to know that someone else cares about us.  So show someone!
  Let me close with sharing the story of a friend of mine.  My friends daughter, Bryce has Neurofibromatosis (nf1). She has a large plexiform type neurofibroma in her right thigh and abdomen.  (In layman's terms, she has a HUGE tumor on her upper thigh!)  She has been dealing with chronic pain for over five years. On September 21 she had this large mass debulked in Chicago at Children's Memorial Hospital. The surgery was risky and took all day. The surgeon, Dr. Mckay Mckinnon is experienced in removing these tumors with great success at reducing pain and them not growing back. No surgeons in Michigan wanted to attempt the surgery saying it is too risky that these tumors bleed a lot during surgery and she may lose the use of her right leg.  Brenda battled insurance companies, and many times we would have long conversations where she had some serious questions for God.  Everyday life seemed to be a struggle, and Bryce needed constant attention.  The chronic pain kept her from attending school.  If anyone had reason to fall victim to a pity party, it was Brenda!  But she didn't.  Oh sure, she had her moments.  She needed a shoulder, a prayer, someone to go out to coffee with and listen.  But if one of her friends needed something, she'd be there!  She'd be the first to offer to help me clean my house.  She came over and painted my living room with me.  She'd always make sure to ask about how my family was doing.  She's supportive of her friends.  And in doing so, she reflects Christ.  She is humble and other oriented.

My dear friend Brenda!

  Bryce has another week to go in Chicago before she can return home.  I rejoice with them.  I've seen their struggle up close.  I look forward to meeting the new Bryce!  Unencumbered by a 9 pound tumor, and living the life of a "normal" teenager.  And I am thankful for a friend who is humble, selfless and an example of what it means to be "other oriented".  Love you Brenda!!!!
                                                ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Tell me how much you know of the sufferings of your fellowmen and I will tell you how much you have loved them." - Helmut Thielicke

Fall Comfort Food!

My kids will be sooo happy!  I thought I had lost this recipe, and found it in an old message I had sent to my brother in law.  Happy day!!  This is such a good, quick, fall favorite around here. 
*HIGH CARB ALERT!!!

1/4 c. onion chopped
1/3 c. green pepper chopped
1/4 c. butter, melted
1 T. flour
3 1/2 c. milk
2 c. cooked ham, cubed
8 oz pkg ww elbow macaroni, uncooked
1 c. sour cream
1 c. shredded swiss cheese

Saute onion and green pepper in butter until tender; stir in flour and salt. Gradually whisk in milk; add ham and macaroni. Bring mixture to a boil stirring constantly; reduce heat and simmer for 15 minutes. Mix in sour cream and cheese; stir until cheese melts, but do not let boil. Makes 6 servings.

Now, go walk the dog and work it off!

9/11

  Like everyone else, I remember exactly where I was on September 11, 2011.  Okay, I'll tell you, it's the thing to do.  We had just gotten back from a camping trip up north the previous day.  I had 3 little ones at home and was getting ready for the day...breakfast, laundry, etc.  Mark came home to tell me to turn on the T.V.  We were having the same bright sunny weather that N.Y. was having.  I spent the rest of the day glued to the T.V.  The following days, I spent with all of you.  My friends and neighbors, as we came together to comfort each other. 
   I was feeling very dark yesterday and earlier today.  I feel like where we are today, our economy, our government, are all ripple effects of that day 10 years ago.  There is nothing I can say about that day that hasn't been said.  We have a lot of work to do.  I want to leave the American dream for my kids. 
  But I feel better now than I did yesterday.  Maybe its the song.  Music always plays with my emotions.  Maybe it's determination.  I definitely can't give up believing in this country.  When it comes right down to it, most of us, left or right, are good people who care about each other.  God Bless.

Boys of Fall

  It's soo sweet.  And it's something that I observe as somwhat of an outsider.  My husband has a bond with my sons, and that bond is football. Don't get me wrong, I'm a huge encourager!  I love watching my boys  play!  And I can ring a cow bell with the best of 'em!  But, I can't give you my opinion on the single wing offense, and I can't tell you the difference between a half back and a full back.
  My husband  played in High School.  He went to the state championship game...and lost.  He was too short to play college ball, and ended up serving in the military after High School.  I attended one football game in HS.  I think I left before half time.
 My introduction to football began when M. was eight, playing on the local Jr. league team.  I know some mothers hesitate to start their boys in tackle football at a young age, but I wasn't.  There really wasn't any stopping them!  They wanted it, and it was something they shared with their dad.  I never worried about injuries.  Life happens.  And I want them to live life.  I trust my husband's expertise in the matter of raising boys.
  M. shares his dads passion.  Oh, his first year of football!  They lost more than they won, and every losing game, I'd watch for that little eight year old frame to trudge off the field.  I know him by his walk.  Tears streaming down his mud stained face, head hanging.  He gave every bit of himself in every game he played!  Physically and emotionally!  He was driven.  He was homeschooled at the time and even back then, he would wear his game jersey to our homeschool co op.  He was proud!
    During M.'s last year of Jr. league, he outgrew his age!  There wasn't an ounce of fat on him and he was trying to drop weight. The league we were  with had a weight limit.   M. was unable to lose the weight he needed, and so, was unable to play.  That was their winning year. He stood on the sidelines every game, and helped his dad coach his littlest brother's team.   The boys he had played with for the last six years, his brother included, were going to the championship game...without him.  That's one game I will never forget.  The kids were so excited, they were playing under the lights at the high school!  I sat in the stands with him, and as the clock wound down, and we knew we were going to win, it was a frenzy of conflicting emotions!  B. was on the team, and I was happy for B!  And next to me sat M., watching others celebrate the victory that he so longed for, for the past six years.  And just like when he was eight, I watched the tears roll down his face while he sat in the stands looking on as his brother, teammates, and fans rushed the field to celebrate.  I can't tell you how much my heart hurt for him!!
  In some states, you can homeschool your kids and they can still play sports for the public schools.  Not in Michigan.  After much consideration, we chose to enroll M. in the local public High School...for football.  That really was our only reason!  I could not stand in the way of his dreams.  Since then he has made the JV team as a freshman.  I was glad for him as this victory came on the heels of the previous years Championship drama.  As a sophomore, he was pulled up to varsity.  Four games into the season, he broke his foot in practice.  After getting word at the doctors office that his foot was indeed broken, he kept it together until he left the office.  We made it to a bench in the lobby and he couldn't even stand, he was crushed.  I had a six foot 215 lb. "man" sobbing on my shoulder.  All he wanted was to play.  God it hurts!  I wanted nothing more than to have my foot broken instead of his.  Holding on to each other, and me crying with him, we sat in the lobby like that for 15 minutes.  It's an emotional roller coaster, this game! 
  This year, he made captain.  Proud is putting it mildly!  He has shown dedication and leadership and was recognized for it.  He's not a partier.  He has a few close friends.  Football motivates his GPA.  He wants to play college ball.  The first day of summer vacation, he was at the school, in the weight room.  If the High School's weight room was open over the summer, he was there!  He brought along his brothers with him.  He and his father have influenced them.  And this year B. begins his freshman year at the same school  M. attends.  Following in his brothers footsteps, he too made the JV team.  B. shows the same willingness and commitment to work hard to achieve his goals.  I'm glad that it's his brother that's his role model.
  Through it all, Mark has been their biggest fan.  Mark's been at every practice.  He coached for six years.  I don't think he's ever missed one of their games.  He doesn't belittle mistakes.  He IS one hell of a cheerleader!  He's the dad that the whole student body knows, because of his booming voice cheering on the boys from the stands, and his ability to keep everyone entertained!  Mark will sit with the boys after school and watch video of the weeks previous game. He is commited to them.
  At last weeks game, he went up to the school an hour and a half before the game started, just because he was excited.  I drove up to drop off some snacks and drinks so I wouldn't have to carry them later, and there he sat, top row, right under the press box (so he can hear what they say), alone and waiting, just staring out at the field.  I tease him.  I tell him he's living vicariously through the boys, but he's not.  He shares their passion for the game!  He's never forced them to play, but he won't let them quit something they've made a commitment to.  He tears up at the Kenny Chesney song "Boys of Fall", and in turn, so do I.  He loves watching them play.  And he's proud of the men they are becoming. I still have a hard time understanding the game of football. What I do understand is the bond that it is between my husband and his sons.  I love that they share it.  I don't mind being on the outside looking in.

Soo long ago.  So little.  I love this pic. 

Click here to watch the Boys of Fall...better grab tissue!

They Don't Understand...

   I had an interesting conversation with a friend this morning.  There seems to be a theme because I had the same conversation with someone else last week.  What is the theme?  Judgement.  We are all so quick to judge others, without knowing their circumstances.  Let me explain...
   We all make judgement calls on people.  You can say, "Oh, I don't judge!"  But we do.  Someone makes a fb comment and offends us.  And we judge.  We tell ourselves, that's not someone I want to associate with.  They are bad, rude, mean, inappropriate...etc.  We've made a judgement based on a behavior or a comment.  Sometimes rightly, sometimes wrongly.  Sometimes we don't have enough information to make the right decision.  Sometimes we let an offense consume us, or we let it negatively interfere with another relationship.  Me?  I'm guilty.  But I'm working on it!
  There are people in my life that I am cautious with.  I don't necessarily "click" with them.  And I don't chum around with them.  You don't have to.  But, before we ostracize any and everyone who has ever stepped on our toes, or doesn't see eye to eye with us on everything, perhaps we should step back and try to gain a better understanding.  Why were they rude on fb?  Why did they cut you off in the parking lot?  Why is he so arrogant?  People claim to be compassionate about the plight of others, but too often we are all talk.  We don't take time to find out their story.  Maybe the whiny brat in the grocery store just buried his mother.  Maybe the rude waitress at lunch has a cheating husband.  Maybe that offensive friend on fb has a child with emotional issues. 
  In my friends situation, the two offended parties refused to attend an event where the offender would be.  They would miss out on reconnecting with others who would be there, and wanted to see them.  It seems a shame.  The offended person then turned around, and stepped on the toes of another. 
  It's not always best to act on your first response, in other words, don't blurt out what a jerk you think the person is.  Listen to others.  Quit doing all of the talking.  It's not always all about you!  You don't have to be sappy, you don't have to drudge up dirty laundry.  Just be polite, even when you don't necessarily want to be.  There is truth in "You get more flies with honey."  Show concern for others.  You get what you give.  These are just the simple lessons your mom taught you.  Civility.

  I'm not trying to sound preachy, but if we could just take a little time to gain an understanding of others.  If we were not so sensitive, so easily hurt and quick to judge, maybe we'd know how to handle situations differently.  And just maybe... we'd get along.  I think this song sums it up.

Mom and E.'s Big Adventure!

I've never seen the bridge from here before! 
Five miles of amazing engineering.

The Mighty Mac

   What a whirlwind summer it's been! I can feel it slipping away. The past two nights have been great for sleeping (in the 50's), but it smells like September. My two older boys have started two a days for football. For me, that just means they are already on a school schedule. I wake up, and they are gone. They don't get home till 2:30. It never fails that summer seems to fade away long before I feel I've had enough of my kids to myself!

    I shouldn't complain too much, we've had a great time this summer! One on one time with any of the boys is a good thing. We were up north for a little over a week. Mark, M. and B. left early along with a friend of M's that we brought along. This left E. and I up to our own devices for two days! Monday, E. and I took Mackinac Island by storm!!

    We awoke to sunshine, blue skies, and bright fluffy clouds. Perfect! Whipped up some pancakes, settled the dog into the camper. Camera, wallet, cell phone attached to belt loops and inserted into hidden pockets. No bags today! We will be biking the island!!

There are several ferry lines that can take you to the island. One of them is some kind of jet boat that spews water fifty feet into the air behind it, and is supposed to get you there in fifteen minutes. That was not for us! This was mom and E.'s Big Adventure!! We wanted to savor every moment and make it last. A half hour ferry ride gave us time to take pictures, people watch on the boat, and feel the wind in our face.

Me and E. at the beginning of our big adventure!

First view of the Island

   Upon our arrival, the first thing we saw as we left the docks, was the bike rental place. This is no coincidence. Mackinac Island has no cars! As the story goes, when cars were first brought to the island, one backfired and spooked a horse, since then...NO cars allowed! While standing in line and surveying our choices, we spotted the tandem bike! Neither one of us had ever been on one, and the thought was appealing...we went for it! We got on, adjusted and took a wobbly spin down the first block.

    The toughest part is merging into traffic after stopping at a scenic spots...and there are a lot of them! Bike traffic is heavy, and small children (as well as some adults) tend to think they are the only ones on the road. They'll stop and converse in the middle of the street (and even park their bikes), forcing those coming up behind them to swerve into oncoming traffic!

You have to really trust the person "driving"...I drove!!!  lol!!!

    We made sure to stop at Arch Rock. It took me ten minutes just to find a parking spot among what seemed like hundreds of bikes! Nobody worries about chaining them up. If you are going to steal anything, it's for sure not going to be a rental bike. We started the steep climb up the hill to the arch. We must be in tough economic times, because it doesn't look like the state of Michigan Parks System has done anything to the steps or handrails in a good 20 years! This isn't comforting to someone who loathes (and I don't use the word lightly!) heights. I made it to the top, and was it worth it!! Amazing views of Lake Huron! Michigan is so much more than auto plants. Now, for the hike down, which was worse because you can see exactly how high up you are!

 

Arch Rock

Look at those little bikes down there!

Incredible views!

As we  peddled our way around the eight mile perimeter of the island, we noticed rock towers all along the beach.  Some big, some small, some with embellishments such as pine twigs added, or beach wood connecting two towers.  People would pull their bikes off to the side and create their own little monument as proof that they had visited the island.  Not wanting to miss a thing, E. and I pulled over to make a rock monument of our own!  As I looked at the time on my cell phone (we were renting the bike by the hour) I began to imagine the owner of the bike rental shop sneaking out to the area beaches under the light of the moon, making tower upon tower of rocks!  A slick, marketing scheme to keep customers out on the trails longer!!

Little stone towers everywhere along the beach!

You have to find good flat stones to make your tower taller.

Michelle and David Miller (whoever you are) we found your stone!!

E. and I with the tower we built.

Most of the island is owned by the state parks system, so once you leave the town proper, there are only a handful of houses that line the trail. Small cottages with forest behind and stunning views of the lake in front. Occasionally, you would see horses corralled in the yard. So it came as a surprise to find the big, lodge style home atop a hill! The windows on the first floor had been boarded up, and many on the second were broken. The paint was chipped and the weeds had taken over. It semed a hundred years old!  The Ghost and Mrs. Muir come to mind.  But it had mystique...and I loved it! Who would have left it? The house had a history, and I wanted to know more!

The cottage adjacent to the main house.

I just love it!!  If I win lotto, I'm buying it!

Tell me if you see a face in any of the windows...

Beautiful old boat!  I would love to see the inside.

Devils Kitchen

We passed beautiful boats, stunning homes, amazing scenery, and after two hours on our tandem bike, I was happy to hear E. exclaim, "I'm tired, my butt hurts, lets get lunch!!"  That was just what I was thinking.  We made our way to the rental place, then tossed around our options for lunch.  It really was a no brainer.  I told E., there's only one place to go...The Pink Pony!  We made our way through the bar and to the hostess station.  It would be a 20 minute wait, but that was okay.  We were on "island time"!  We decided to find a way to fill our time.  We walked over to the front desk of the adjoining hotel and managed to talk our way into a self guided tour of the Honeymoon suite.  Very nice!  E. was impressed with the hot tub in the room and commented that it would make for a very romantic evening!!  YIKES!!

E. checking out the amenities in the Honeymoon Suite.

The whole place was just charming!

   Our tour was cut short when our buzzer went off to let us know that our table on the patio was ready.  The patio at the Pink Pony was voted best in Michigan, and for good reason!  The views of the harbor are amazing!  So, my  review?  Views...exceptional.  Food...good.  Service...our waiter mumbled!  I kept having him repeat himself!  General atmosphere...the music was tuned to a local pop station (the banter of the DJ was annoying), and was too loud.  I was hoping for something somewhat more sophisticated to go along with the setting.  The company...couldn't get ANY better!!  As we sat chatting over our morning ride, E. became quiet and stared at me.  Being the smart alec that I am, I asked if he was impressed with how beautiful his mother is?!  ;)  He said "No."  (eh~hem!!)  He said he was thinking about how awesome it was that I would do all of this for him today, this "Mom and E's Big Adventure".  WOW!  I almost started to bawl, but I didn't want to lose the upbeat tempo of the day!  It wasn't an extravagant day.  We spent some money, but not too much.  It was just an adventure, just the two of us, but what an impact it had!  We need more adventures.

E. at the Pink Pony

Pink Lemonade at the Pink Pony!

I'm a ham.  I know.

View from the lower patio.

I enjoyed the whitefish taco with sweet potato fries!

   Our day began to wind down after lunch.  We strolled on over to the Museum on Merchant street where fellow blogger Brenda (of Bree's Mackinac Island Blog http://bree1972.wordpress.com/) works on Mondays.  I enjoy her blog, filled with stories and info on the Island.  I thought it would be fun to meet her.  She had worked earlier that morning and we had missed her.  However, we weren't disappointed!  Candy (who works the afternoon shift at the museum) and her cousin Stella, were a HOOT!!!  Truly, friendly Island natives!!  I look forward to seeing them again!  (Stella, stay on the Island!!!)
   I asked Candy about the big, old, abandoned house we had seen on our bike ride.  They knew of the house and said that it had been owned by...wait for it...the island's UNDERTAKER!!  I asked how long it had been abandoned, they said it wasn't.  The story gets better...apparently, his son still lives there!  Images of The Ghost and Mrs. Muir disappeared, only to be replace by visions of Psycho racing through my head.  It all seemed great fodder for the overactive imaginations of the Island's children at Halloween!

Candy and I

...and Stella too!

E. thought it was cool that this little one was bidding us farewell, and snapped a pic!

A favorite stop whenever we are up north..."The Big Dipper"!

     Our last stop on the Island was at May's for some fudge.  You can't go to the Island without bringing back fudge.  It's okay, I embrace the title "Fudge Sucking Lowlander"!  We thought about a carriage ride, but decided that would put us back at camp later than we wanted.   We went to the docks, and waited for the ferry to take us back to the mainland.  On the drive home, we hit our favorite ice cream shop in Cheboygan.  My kids are growing up so fast.  And my time with them is so short.  School and will be staring soon, and along with it a crazy schedule filled with extra curricular activities.  And in the midst of it, I will remember a warm summer day with a gentle lake breeze, and a twelve year old boy who thought I was the best because I spent it with him.
    
 

Sisters, Boobs and Breast Cancer!

  Wow!  It's been  while since I've been here.  July has been a busy month!  Campfire Musings all across the east coast!  I've just gotten back from Massachusetts.  I was out there for the wedding of my youngest sister.  The trip coincided with my middle sisters recent discovery that she has breast cancer.  The news came as quite a shock.  This is going to take a while to write, I feel it already!  Are sibling relationships the most complex?  This is as much about relationships, as it is about my sisters cancer.
  We are as much alike in some respects as we are different.  And when we fight?  Ohhh....don't get in the way!!  It's like watching hurricane clouds over a boiling sea!  I can fight with her, but I get very defensive if someone else messes with my sister!  Her husband is an only child.  He doesn't get it at all! 
  In actuality, the older we get, the less we fight.  Chalk it up to maturity.  But every now and then, like a volcano, it blows!  Is she at fault?  YES!  Am I?  Yes.  But here's the thing, I can't control her.  I can't control her actions.  I can only control me.  She may still act poorly,  (she probably will!!  lol!! )  as will I, but it's my responsibility to change my behavior.  People are who they are.  It's a matter of accepting  them as such.  Diplomacy is an art!  Not saying that you can't discuss issues that arise.  But it's not my job to change anyone.  Leave that up to God.  He gave us 2 ears and one mouth so that we could listen more than we talk.
  So...cancer.  Fortunately, we had very gradually come back to a decent place in our relationship before she was diagnosed.  For that I am thankful.  She will be having both breasts removed.  She is 36.  She has a beautiful 1 year old daughter.  Her treatment will be aggressive and there will be a 50% chance that she will be infertile when all is said and done.  IVF is not a viable option.  This has been the biggest blow as she and her husband looked forward to adding to their family.  But, despite everything, she is taking on this battle with determination, strength, and a Whitcomb sense of humor.   You don't have to whisper when you say cancer!   I never knew there were so many "boobie" jokes!
  In a little over a week, she will start treatment.  I wish I could be out there for her while she goes through this process.  She will be having a "Head Shaving Party" at her salon.  I LOVE this idea!  Talk about turning a negative into a positive!!  Others will be getting their heads shaved, and there will be snacks and drinks.  Wanting to do what I could I eagerly offered to shave my head as well!!!  It seemed a good idea at the time...until I saw her really cute wig, done in a sassy blonde style.  Hmmm.  I reconsidered as my insurance won't cover the super cute wig. 
  What can I do to support.  Pink ribbon?  Eh.  I want to do something that would remind me daily to pray for her.  I want to do something pro active.  I want to fight with her.  For a long time I have been battling my weight.  The older I get, the less healthy I become.  Along with the extra weight comes a higher risk of cancer and a myriad of other health problems.  I've taken my health for granted.  Tricia has to fight.  If she can take on battling breast cancer, a fight she didn't start, I can for sure take on the extra pounds that have been torturing me!  Each time I am tempted, is a reminder to meditate and pray for her.  So I dedicate my struggle to her.  It may sound weird, but it's what I'm doing.  So keep her in your prayers, and I'll update you on the progress!   Here is a picture of Trish and her boobies!

Oh, the hat?  Looong story!

Tricia and Tracy