Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Here I am again.  

It's been a while.  I haven't wanted to get on here, until now.  I've been on a journey of sorts (Without trying to sound all philosophical). It's been a very personal journey of self discovery.  If I were to look back, I think I may have begun my journey when I started this blog.  I started this for me, nobody else.  It was meant to be cathartic. What I've been dealing with has been too personal, to intense to share here.  But I'm back.  And in control of my life.  

So, let's catch up, shall we?  Where has my journey taken me?  Well, I've made some changes.  Positive changes.  I've lost 100 lbs.  I've made a lifestyle change to a paleo diet.  (a work in progress)  I used to hate the gym!  I've grown to love it.  It has been a constant in a battle against depression.  A time solely for me and for me alone. Therapy!

I've been told what I'm experiencing is a "Mid Life Crisis".  My well meaning girlfriend suggested I was hormonal and pre-menopausal!  I suppressed the urge to slap her!!  Whatever you want to call it, I'm trying to figure out who I want to be when I grow up.  My kids are on the launching pad, and my role is changing.  I've been stagnant and refuse to remain so any longer.  I have a finite amount of time on this earth and I want to get everything I can out of it! I want to live life!

I started this journey alone.  Very alone.  I have company now!  I am writing this not just for me, (as it may seem more of a journal entry) but to encourage.  I was recently asked what the most courageous thing I had ever done.  Well, I'd never rescued anyone from a burning building.  I'd never parachuted out of a plane (and I NEVER will!!!)  The most courageous thing I have ever done is to change, and that was scary!!  I saw things I didn't like about me, or my life, and I went about changing them.  The best thing is, Mark decided to make changes as well.  And that is what I was missing most.  Some company! 


  1. Welcome back! It seems I found your blog just as you took your hiatus.And, ironically, it also seems that we are both at the same crossroads in our lives. I began my own blog, then stalled...then started again...and stalled, again. I too have been searching for my happy place, needing to make changes in my life and learning that my best friend has ALWAYS been at my side! I am glad to say I am well on the path to my happy place. There are still struggles, but I know I can deal with them! Now, if I could only get rid of the idea that nothing I have to say is blog worthy and just go write something.

  2. Tammy, we should meet for coffee! Glad you are on the path to your happy place. You are not alone!!